AC stupids

As you all know from a previous post that my hubby got new ACU's ( Army Combat Uniform's). The Army's new version of the Battle Dress Uniform. He has had them about a week, and just figured out last night, at 7:30 pm, that they actually needed to be washed for his next day's shift. This is how the conversation went:
Him: "Babe, can you wash my ACU's?"
Me: I roll my eyes because I had already done the days laundry and had just gotten on the computer to do some blog reading. "Ok," sigh!!!!
Him: "Oh, I heard you have to be careful to not ruin them," and "Oh yah, you need to use only certain kind of detergent."
Me: more eye rolling. "What kind of detergent?"
Him: "I don't know!" (big surprise here!)
Me: "Read the label." Don't ya think?
Him: "OK"
Him again after reading the label: "You need to use a detergent without optical brighteners."
Me: "What the hell are optical brighteners?"
Him: "I don't know."
Me: a lot more eye rolling. "I guess I can look online since I'm already on the computer." I am in luck because Winekpedia actually has a list of all the detergents that do contain optical brighteners and all the one's that don't. Do you think I have any that don't? Of course not.
Me: "I don't have any of these, since there are only about 10 that don't."
Him: "I guess I better run to the to the commissary and get some before it closes."
Me: "Ok!"
Him: "Babe?"
Me: Ut Oh!
Him: "Do you think you can come with me so I don't get the wrong kind?"
Me: Ultimate eye rolling. "Ok." Being the nice wife I am (he better remember this at Christmas,) of course I will go make sure you don't get the wrong kind, even though I made an extensive detailed list no one could possibly screw up, especially a soldier who manages a squad in the US Army. At this point I am thinking "what the heck did he do before he married me?"
So off we go to the Commissary before it closes and wouldn't you know they only have one on my list that I can use in my front load washer. "Cheer He." I pick it up and go to check out on the way buying more stuff I don't need.
Him: "Uh, babe?"
Me: "What?"
Him: "Are you sure this is the right one?"
Me: Yes, it is on my list, and it is the only one here I can use in my machine." I'm thinking "if it's a choice between ruining your ACU's and ruining my machine buster, it will be the ACU's or you can go to your own laundry mat and use their machines." Of course I smile sweetly and go my merry way up to the register.
Him: "Babe, can you buy me some mentos?"
Me: "I guess so!" I'm thinking, "buy your own damb Mentos!"
Him: Thanks.
Right about now I am not surprised that some guy wrote a book called "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus." I am just surprised it was a man who figured this out!